Trump vs. Snail Mail


Trump vs. Snail Mail

The US Postal Service has become a surprisingly relevant political issue, considering the fact that most Americans haven’t sent a letter since they were forced to write to their French pen pals in sixth grade and say things like, “I enjoy watching TV and playing soccer.”


In the past decade, the department has been financially struggling. Then, an investigation earlier this year revealed that the mail trucks have started spontaneously combusting. The mailmen were fine but RIP all those spam letters from AARP addressed to “current resident.” 


Recently, Louis DeJoy a multi-million-dollar major donor to Trump, was selected as the Postmaster General. And many were not so de-joyous about the decision. 


DeJoy has instructed mail carriers to leave behind mail that will slow them down on their routes. He also told them that they could only park four times along their route. What does he envision? That they’ll cruise by dropping off mail without even stopping the truck, meanwhile throwing postcards out the back window because the tiny bits of paper are “slowing them down”? It’s snail mail, not Ford v. Ferrari.


The result is that tons of mail has been lost. Which would honestly be totally fine and likely go completely unnoticed — if the USPS didn’t also deliver online shopping packages. If your electric bill gets lost, c’est la vie. If your new matching tie-dye pajama set disappears? Well, now that’s a real problem. 


The politicization of mail is appropriate, coming on the heel of the politicization of believing in science and the politicization of trying to stay healthy during a pandemic. 


Part of the problem concerns Trump’s fear mongering over mail in ballots for the November 2020 presidential election. 


Trump wants to have in-person voting because he fears mail in voting will result in inaccuracies. One way to solve that might be to make the postal service more reliable — not hire a guy who’s telling mailmen to throw out any letters that are slowing them down. 


The other part of the problem is that Trump is having a feud with Jeff Bezos, the founder of Amazon. He thinks that if he hurts the USPS, that will in turn hurt Bezos. (Which will in turn hurt everyone who’s impulse buying books, clothes and random halloween costumes from Amazon). 


The bottom line is, just use email or Fedex. 

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